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Archive for Catalog Releases

Selections from the vast back catalog of Oglio Entertainment.

Robby Glantz “Secrets of Hockey Speed” DVD Series

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From North America to Europe, Robby Glantz continues to be hockey’s most requested skating instructor. His innovative methods for teaching the foundations for speed are used by players at all levels— from youth hockey to the pros. Now these same techniques are available to you in Secrets of Hockey Speed Volume 1…the first video to truly detail the step-by-step methods that will generate top speed. And with demonstrations from NHL stars Steve Duchesne and Tony Granato, easy-to-grasp terminology, and creative camera angles, you are sure to learn what it takes to attain that extra step you have always been looking for. Here are just a few highlights:

The How-to Guide for Faster Skating, Part 1

  • Breakdown of all stride techniques
  • Backwards skating movement
  • How to increase your stride
  • Acceleration while turning
  • Edgework and counterbalancing
  • Explode in your starts
  • Plus, much more!M

Robby Glantz conducts hockey schools throughout North America and Europe. Pro teams he has worked with include the NHL’s Los Angeles Kings and Atlanta Thrashers, Malmo weden, Berlin Preussen, as well as the German National Teams:

Robby Glants "Secrets of Hockey Speed" Vol 2 DVD

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From North America to Europe, Robby Glantz continues to be hockey's most requested skating instructor. His innovative methods for teaching the foundations of speed, power and balance are used by players of all levels, from youth hockey to pro. Robby's professional credits include: Power Skating Coach for the NHL's Los Angeles Kings and Atlanta Thrashers, Malmo Sweden, Berlin Preussen and the German National Teams. As well, Robby and Staff put on almost 200 Power Skating and Stickhandling/ Checking Programs each year. His first instructional video, Volume 1, has been the must have source for better skating.

With the same innovative techniques, easy to understand teaching terminology and creative camera angles, Volume 2 picks up where Volume 1 left off. From there however, Volume 2 concentrates on showing skating techniques not covered in Volume 1, including: Speed with 1 and 2 hands on the stick, Lateral Mobility, Pivot Stops, Quick Feet, Edgework and much more... And Volume 2 will show you how to skate faster with the puck on your stick, including: Breakaway Speed, Change of Direction, Power Moves, Puck Protection and Stickhandling. With Volume 2, you are sure to learn what it takes to get your skating to a new level. Here are just a few highlight:

THE HOW-TO GUIDE FOR FASTER SKATING, PART 2

  • Advanced Techniques and Drills
  • 1 & 2 Hands on Stick
  • Backward Skating Techniques
  • Forward and Backward Stops
  • Gretzky-type Tight Turns
  • Quick Feet & Edge Drills
  • Breakaway Speed with the Puck
  • Power Moves
  • Puck Protection
  • Stickhandling
  • And More!
  • Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling – Kids Jokes

    KIDS ONLY JOKES - SQUEAKY CLEAN - 100% FAMILY FRIENDLY

    Surprising for most fans of former Stern alumni Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling is the fact he has a quietly successful line of kids electronic toys moving over 150,000 units through non-traditional outlets like Brookstone, Bed, Bath & Beyond and more. Finally available on CD, these are the audio only versions of the electronic toys at a great kids price. With Jackie’s voice sped up to give it a fun munchkin effect, these are 100% kid friendly squeaky clean world’s best kids jokes with the Jokemaster Jr Vol. 1 filled with 99 tracks of knock knock jokes and the Grossmaster Jr with 99 tracks of booger jokes and the likes as only kids can love and listen to over and over again.

    With Jackie’s voice sped up to give it a fun munchkin effect, these are 100% kid friendly squeaky clean world’s best kids jokes with the Jokemaster Jr Vol. 1 filled with 99 tracks of knock knock jokes and the Grossmaster Jr with 99 tracks of booger jokes and the likes as only kids can love and listen to over and over again.

    Red Peters – Singles, Ringtones, and Podcast

    WHEN I JERK OFF, I THINK OF YOU


    Red Peters - When I Jerk Off - Single

    I CAN'T SAY THESE THINGS

    Red Peters - I Can't Say These Things (Unbleeped Version) - Single

    RING TONES

    Ballad Of A Dog Named Stains

    Purchase Ring Tone

    Holy S, It's Christmas!

    Purchase Ring Tone

    How's Your Whole... Family?

    Purchase Ring Tone

    I Wanna Polka Polka

    Purchase Ring Tone

    Pullin' It All Night Long

    Purchase Ring Tone

    Take It Out At The Ballgame

    Purchase Ring Tone

    The Closing Song

    Purchase Ring Tone

    The Ten Second National Anthem

    Purchase Ring Tone

    You Ain't Getting S For Xmas

    Purchase Ring Tone

    You Promised The Moon

    Purchase Ring Tone

    The Red Peters Song Snatch

    Podcast

    Red Peters – Ol Blue Balls Is Back

    Buy Now!

    OL' BLUE BALLS IS BACK

    Track Listing

    1. Alan Pinchloaf Welcome (w/Pinchloaf's Theme)

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Alan Pinchloaf Welcome (With Pinchloaf's Theme)

    2. The Spelling Songp

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - The Spelling Song

    3. I Don't Just Love You Down There

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - I Don't Just Love You Down There

    p4. Pullin' It All Night Long

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Pullin' It All Night Long

    5. Pinchloaf segue #1

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Pinchloaf Segue #1

    6. The First Time I Met You

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - The First Time I Met You

    7. I Wanna Polka Polka

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - I Wanna Polka Polka

    8. Doggy Style

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Doggy Style

    9. Babe's Auto Villa

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Babe's Auto Villa

    10. Pinchloaf segue #2

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Pinchloaf Segue #2

    11. You Ain't Getting' Shit For Christmas

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - You Ain't Gettin' Shit for Christmas

    12. Up Your Ass

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Up Your Ass

    13. Long And Hard

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Long and Hard

    14. Natural Causes Chicken

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Natural Causes Chicken

    15. The Closing Song

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - The Closing Song

    16. Pinchloaf segue #3

    p>Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Pinchloaf Segue #3

    17. Use Your Hand

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Use Your Hand

    18. Take It Out At The Ballgame

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Take It Out At the Ballgame

    19. Peenitch

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Peenitch

    20. Gourmet Firewood

    Red Peters - Ol' Blue Balls Is Back - Gourmet Firewood

    OL BLUE BALLS IS BACK

    LYRICS

    Red Peters
    with Babe Marino Orchestra and the Phillip Oliver Hole Singers
    "The Spelling Song"
    (Stevens, Grenga, Johnson)

    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-B-L-O-W-M-E
    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-B-L-O-W-M-E

    These are the words that I wanted to shout
    but I guess it's just best
    if I spell them out

    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-B-L-O-W-M-E
    I-C-A-N-T-S-T-A-N-D-Y-O-U, no more
    G-E-T-T-H-E-F-U-C-K-O-U-T, the door

    These are the words that I want to say
    I think I shall use
    an alternative way

    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-B-L-O-W-M-E

    (girls only)
    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-T-O-O-E-A-T-M-E
    Red- "Hey, wait a minute"
    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-T-O-O-E-A-T-M-E
    Red- "Nice talk."

    I quite understand what I think that you mean
    so I'll try to reply
    without being obscene
    F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-B-L-O-W-M-E

    Red Peters
    with The Harry Kuntz Orchestra
    " I Don't Just Love You Down There"
    (McMahon, Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    I don't just love you down there
    I really care about you as a person
    I don't just dream of your thighs
    for in my eyes
    you fill up my skies
    with your prize
    but I really love you as a person

    I keep on dreaming
    and scheming
    and reaming
    you're gleaming
    and screaming
    tonite

    I don't just love you down there
    yet I'm aware
    what you've got down there
    that's where I stare
    but I really love you as a person
    I really, really do....

    Red Peters
    with Hot Spunky Load
    "Pulling It All Night Long"
    (Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.
    Keep pulling all night long Aha- oh yeah
    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.
    Keep pulling all night long Aha- oh yeah

    I'm standing here
    solution in hand
    half in the bag
    all buffed and tanned
    It's been so long
    and it's getting long again
    so come on over
    and meet your new friend

    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.
    Keep pulling all night long
    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.
    Keep pulling all night long
    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.
    Keep pulling all night long
    Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long.

    Keep pulling all night long
    that tingling feeling
    has got me on my feet
    hands in my pockets
    pulling to the beat
    now there's a spot on you
    and a smile on my face
    let's skip the small talk
    and cut to the chase

    Girls- "Hey Mona, what's up? (laffing) Oh my God look what's coming our way. Nice do!"
    Red- "Hi ladies... My name's Testicles, Lord of the Pants."
    Girls- "what he say?, I think he said he's got a load in his pants."
    Red- "Mind if I lay a few scenarios on you?"
    Red- "If I jumped on your back, would you beat me off?
    Girls- "Ehwww..."
    Red- "If Jack helped you off a horse, would you help Jack off a horse?"
    Red- "If I owned a meat market and you were inside, and all of a sudden it caught on fire, would you take my meat and beat it?"
    Girls- "What an asshole!!!"
    bkgds: "Someone's gonna be pullin it, that someone's gonna be you..."
    Girls- "Oh no, here he comes again."
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long
    Red- "May I have your e-mail address? "
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long
    Girl- "Yah... kiss my ass.com"
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long
    Red- "Why don't you fax me sometime?"
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long
    Girl- "I wouldn't fax you if you were the last guy on earth."
    Red- "Thanks for the input."
    Singers- Keep pulling all night long, pulling it all night long
    etc.

    Red Peters
    with The Windbreakers and the Delicious Dips
    "The First Time That I Met You"
    (Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    I wandered through this crazy town, my head up in a cloud
    Looking for a place to do my biz
    I zipped my fly and saw that I'd attracted quite a crowd
    but your face it was the one I couldn't miss

    The first time that I saw you baby
    I thought I stepped in shit
    At least that's what it felt like baby
    the more I think of it.
    Now I stand here unafraid
    I wanna get laid (he wants to get laid)
    I wanna get laid

    we talked all nite and got to know each other inside out
    you taught me what it means to be a girl
    and should I find it hard again I won't sit here and pout
    we'll take a little trip around the world

    (girls only)
    The first time that you met me baby
    you thought that I was such a pig

    (Red)
    but that's what I love about you baby
    You really do the things I dig
    and I'm so glad that you stayed
    now I wanna get laid

    I wanna get laid in the sunshine
    I wanna get laid in the moonlight baby
    I'd rather get blown but I'll settle for a handy
    as long as it's your hand and not my own

    The first time that we held each other
    I thought I'd lose my place
    you guided me inside your mind, love
    and then onto your face
    The greatest love the world has ever known
    I wanna get blown (he wants to get blown)
    I wanna get blown
    and then I wanna get laid

    Red Peters
    with the Ivan Offelcockich Orchestra
    "I Wanna Polka Polka"
    (Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    See that girl with the pretty red dress on,
    I wanna polka.
    I love the way she spins and twirls,
    I wanna polka.

    Oh how I wish that she'd look my way now,
    Then I could polka.
    I'd love to feel those pretty little curls,
    How I wanna polka.

    We took a little trip down to Love Canal (NY),
    So I could polka.
    but we stopped in French Lick, Indiana
    No time to polka!

    Intercourse Pennsylvania was my destination
    wanted to polka.
    But she left me down in Blue Ball PA,
    Never got to polka.

    well I went up to Maine to Bangor
    then I went down to Florida to Tampa
    but when all is said and done
    I'd rather polka.

    We spent sometime in Flushing NY,
    I had to polka.
    She said not until we get to Hygiene CO,
    then maybe I could polka.

    I said first let's stop at Moorehead Jersey,
    before I polka.
    Things got salty in Saline Michigan,
    Never got to polka.

    She said let's go to Bonesteel, (SD)
    now there's a place I'll polka.
    but it went Askew in Mississppi,
    Didn't know if I could polka.

    Climax MI was our destination,
    She wanted me to polka.
    but I had to make a stop in Crappo MD,
    I lost the urge to polka.

    well I went up to Maine to Bangor
    then I went down to Florida to Tampa
    but when all is said and done
    I'd rather polka.

    French Lick, Love Canal
    Blue Ball, Moorehead
    I Wanna Polka

    Bonesteel, Intercourse
    Climax, Crappo
    I Wanna Polka

    Tampa, Flushing
    Hygiene, Saline
    I Wanna Polka

    Gaysport (OH), Gayhead (MA)
    Gayville (SD), Mudlick (KY)
    I Wanna polka

    Red Peters
    with Meat Raffle and Cousins & Lovers
    "Doggy Style"
    (Grenga, Phillips)

    Shitfaced on Sunday, work on Monday,
    Tuesday's kind of a drag
    Wednesday's a hummer, Thursday's a bummer,
    Fridays I'm half in the bag
    Saturday evenin', I'm still reelin'
    from a ten pack Smirnoff nips
    Now I can barely see your face
    so put away those chains and whips

    cause I say
    Let's do it doggy style
    Let's do it doggy style
    Let's do it doggy style so we can both watch TV

    January, February, April May June and July
    August September, October November,
    whatever happened to March
    New Year's evenin', I'm still reelin'
    from a twelve pack o' Miller beer
    Quit blockin the television babe
    and get your sweet ass over here

    Now Hee Haw is my favorite program.
    And Flipper and the Simpsons ain't bad
    Now I don't like the Nanny but I like watchin her fanny
    and Gloria's gotten so fat that it makes me sad yeah
    and that Ginger is one hot tomatah,
    but I think I prefer Mary Ann
    Now if you don't wanna do it the hell with it screw it
    just don' let me take matters into my own hands yeah

    Red Peters
    with Smelly Water with The Alan Pinchloaf Singers
    "You Ain't Getting Shit For Christmas"
    (Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    They say Christmas is a time for giving - at least that's what the good book says, and at our house every Christmas Eve my son and daughter and their families drive down from the big city for an old fashioned family holiday. Ma dresses the house up like a Christmas card, you can hear her in the kitchen singing while she's baking cookies for the children. Ma spends hours wrapping the presents she's been buying since last August and hangs all the stockings over the fireplace. The morning of, I cut me down the prettiest darn Christmas tree you ever saw in your life. Eh, this year we really outdid ourselves. You know, Ma and I are getting on in our years so we decided to give the kids tax-free cash gifts of $10,000 apiece.

    I reckon it was around noon, I heard the dogs barking (yells "Come Rags!, Come Guzzler!") and there was Jim the mailman in his old santa cap, coming up the walk teasing the dogs, holding a package. Well he handed it over to me and says "Pappy, looks like you got an overnite package from your daughter". I went back in the kitchen and Ma tore it open. To our horror we unwrapped a fruitcake with a note that read...

    "Aloha Ma & Dad, at the last minute we got a cheap fare on the internet and went to Hawaii. Hold onto our gifts until after the first of the year. Love, Princess."

    Well, Ma's heart was broken and I felt a lump in my throat as I thought to myself...

    You Ain't Getting Shit For Christmas
    You can shove that fruitcake up your ass
    well you ain't getting shit
    no you ain't getting dick
    you ain't getting shit for Christmas

    You know, Ma hasn't had a drink in 20 years and I've been off the sauce a while myself and heck, if there was ever an excuse to start drinking again. (sfx-doorbell) Who in tarnation could that be, Junior and his family? It was some delivery fella standing there holding what looked like a fruitcake tin with a card attached.

    "Pop, the company's condo is free this week and you know how much Pumpkin and I love Hilton Head. Please forward our gifts to this address."

    Hey Ma, save some for me.
    Well, Ma took a coniption things turned ugly. She started breaking things and hurled the turkey and those two fruitcakes right through the front window, the whole time she was yelling...

    You Ain't Getting Shit For Christmas
    You can shove that fruitcake up your ass
    well you ain't getting shit
    no you ain't getting dick
    you ain't getting shit for Christmas

    Red Peters
    with Shootin' Pool With A Rope
    Long And Hard
    (Orrall)

    I was never good enough for you
    Except for all those sleepless nights
    When you loved me black and blue

    You said I was good for nothing
    But there's one thing I could do
    Now your memory's trying to tell you

    If you think about me long hard
    You'll remember why you love me
    Think about the length
    Of time you spent just above me.

    In the bedroom, in the car,
    in the nieghbor's yard
    You'll remember why you love
    If you think about me long and hard.

    The way you look is practically a crime
    A man would have to be insane
    to leave that behind
    You'll never find a smiling fool
    with one as big as mine,
    I wonder now how do you fill your time.

    If you think about me long hard
    You'll remember why you love me
    Think about the length
    Of time you spent just above me.

    In the kitchen, in your truck
    I know I measured up
    You'll remember why you love me
    If you think about me long and hard.

    In the front yard 'n the rear
    After half a dozen beers
    You'll remember why you love me
    If you think about me long and hard.

    In the outhouse, in the woods
    Hell anywhere we could.
    You'll remember why you love me
    If you think about me long and hard.

    Red Peters
    and Dumpster Punch
    "The Closing Song"
    (Vercillo, Grenga, Stevens, Johnson)

    It's that time again
    we gotta say good night
    you know it's getting late
    tomorrow is another day my friend

    you don't have to go home
    but you can't stay here
    now you're making me mad
    you gonna make me swear

    get the fuck outta here
    finish up that beer
    you might as well call it a night my friend
    you gonna have ta
    get the fuck out

    all right... aha... mmm

    maybe I'm outta line
    but I'll take the blame
    there are no better choice of words
    that I can use to explain

    get the fuck outta here
    finish up that beer
    I'm gonna have to ask you to leave my friend
    you gonna have to
    get the fuck out
    get the fuck out

    Hey Buddy, I'm talking to you
    thanks for comin', now pay your tab and screw
    make like a drum and beat it
    make like a tree and leave
    all you fellas and cinderellas
    I'm giving you the heave

    ooo, get the fuck outta here
    finish up that beer
    call it a night old friend
    get the fuck out
    get the fuck out

    so long
    arrivederci
    sayanara
    ciao
    good night
    Bye bye
    so long
    farewell
    see you later
    alligator
    in a while
    crocodile
    say goodnight
    get the fuck out
    get the fuck outta here
    come on
    give me a fuckin' break
    (customer) "Can I get a refill, please?"
    hey, you, fuckface
    get outta here
    what are you, fuckin' deaf?
    yah, you...

    Red Peters
    with Marshmellow Piggy Bank
    and The Moron Tabernipple Choir orchestra conducted by Yo Ma Ma
    "Use Your Hand Anthem"
    (Stevens, Lawry, Johnson, Grenga)

    Yesterday when we spoke
    you said you'd do anything
    anything I asked you to do
    yesterday when we spoke
    you promised me love and affection
    and honey I'm long overdue

    but when I see you
    I know that things aren't looking right
    there is something about you
    that says "no, not tonite."

    when I'm all backed up
    how can you leave me this way
    you gotta do me a favor
    and this is all I'll say...
    Use Your Hand
    Use Your Hand
    Use Your Hand (have mercy now)
    Use Your Hand On Me
    Use Your Hand (use your hand)
    Use Your Hand (use your hand)
    Use Your Hand
    Use Your Hand On Me

    now we're sitting side by side
    kissing in the car
    but everytime I reach for anything
    I don't get very far
    I can see you're hot and heavy
    you're soaking up my seat
    can't you see my balls are blue
    my face red as a beet

    when I'm all backed up
    how can you leave me this way
    you gotta do me a favor
    and this is all I'll say...
    Use Your Hand
    Use Your Hand
    Use Your Hand (have mercy now)
    Use Your Hand On Me
    Use Your Hand (use your hand)
    Use Your Hand (use your hand)
    Use Your Hand

    Buy Now!

    Red Peters – I Laughed I Cried I Fudged My Undies

     

    Buy Now!

    RED PETERS

    I LAUGHED... I CRIED... I FUDGED MY UNDIES!

    Track Listing

    1. Baby Blue Intro (with Alan Pinchloaf)

    Red Peters with Alan Pinchloaf - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Baby Blue Intro

    2. Blow Me (You Hardly Even Know Me)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Blow Me (You Hardly Even Know Me)

    3. How's Your Whole... Family?

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - How's Your Whole.....Family?

    4. The Two Gay Irishmen

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - The Two Gay Irishmen

    5. Rocket In My Pants

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Rocket In My Pants

    6. Intro By Alan Pinchloaf

    Alan Pinchloaf - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Intro

    7. Holy Shit, It's Christmas

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Holy Shit, It's Christmas

    8. Ballad Of A Dog Named Stains

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Ballad of a Dog Named Stains

    9. The Dark Years: Stains Incident / Tourette Benefit / I'm A Pig / Did You Ever Fudge Your Undies In The Rain? / Fudge Rap / Oggie, The Doggie Bag Slicer / Italian Polka

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - The Dark Years

    10. Little Peter

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Little Peter

    11. You Promised The Moon (But I Preferred Uranus)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - You Promised the Moon (But I Preferred Uranus)

    12. Baby Blue

    (Instrumental)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Baby Blue (Instrumental)

    13. Blow Me (You Hardly Even Know Me)

    (Instrumental)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Blow Me (Instrumental)

    14. You Promised The Moon (But I Preferred Uranus)

    (Karaoke Mix)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - You Promised the Moon (Karaoke Mix)

    15. Blow Me (You Hardly Even Know Me)

    (Karaoke Mix)

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Blow Me (Karaoke Mix)

    16. Diana

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - Diana

    17. The 10 Second National Anthem

    Red Peters - I Laughed.....I Cried....I Fudged My Undies! - The Ten Second National Anthem

    Red Peters
    with The Heywood Jablomi Singers
    "Baby Blue"

    (Grenga/Stevens/Lawry)

    Baby Blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby, baby blue
    Baby blew.....
    ...me.

    Red Peters
    with The Babe Marino Orchestra
    (featuring The Alan Pinchloaf Singers)
    "Blow Me (You Hardly Even Know Me)"

    (Stevens/Grenga)

    (whispered)
    "This is very special...
    Hi Dick... Bob.
    ... pretty good thanks."

    (sung)
    Blow me
    You hardly even know me
    just set yourself below me
    and blow me... tonite.

    a handy
    would certainly be dandy
    but it's not enough to slow me
    you gotta blow me... allright.

    when you part your lips that way
    ooo... I want you night and day
    when you squeeze my balls so tight
    I wanna blow my load with all my might!!

    so blow me
    you hardly even know me
    just set yourself below
    you gotta blow me tonite

    "Come on everybody!!!" (whole audience joins in)

    Blow me
    You hardly even know me
    so blow me
    you gotta blow me
    so blow me
    Blow me tonite!

    Red Peters
    with Tex Marino and The Poisonaires
    "How's Your Whole... Family?"
    (Stevens/Grenga/Lawry)

    How's your whole... family?
    How's your whole... family?
    How's your whole... family?
    How's your whole... family?

    How's your whole... family? (How's your whole?)
    How's your whole... family? (How's your whole?)
    How's your whole... family? (How's your whole... family?)
    How's your whole... family?

    How's your dic-tation machine? (How's your dic-)
    How's your dic-tation machine? (How's your dic-)
    How's your dic-tation machine? (How's your dic-tation machine?)
    How's your dic-tation machine?

    Take your pants down... to the cleaners today. (ah-ooo)
    Take your pants down... to the cleaners today. (ah-ooo)
    Take your pants down... to the cleaners today. (ah-ooo)
    Take your pants down... to the cleaners today.

    Won't you do my as-trological chart? (oh won't you do his as-)
    Won't you do my as-trological chart? (come on-a wanna baby won't you do his as-)
    Won't you do my as-trological chart? (oh won't you do his as-trological chart?)
    Won't you do my as-trological chart?

    Suck on a stiff cock-tail with me. (stiff cock- ah-ooo)
    Suck on a stiff cock-tail with me. (stiff cock- ah-ooo)
    Suck on a stiff cock-tail with me. (stiff cock- ah-ooo)
    Suck on a stiff cock-tail with me.

    How's your whole... family? (How's your whole?)
    How's your whole... family? (Tell me how's that great big whole)
    How's your whole... family? (How's your whole... family?)
    How's your whole... family?
    (spoken) "Prick!"

    Red Peters
    with the Smokin' Cockneys
    "The Two Gay Irishmen"

    (Stevens/Grenga/Johnson/Lawry)

    The whole clan met at Galway Bay
    where seamen push up stools
    they were giggling like the Coleens
    and playing pocket pool
    they washed their balls in stout that night
    and bid their last good-byes
    "We're off to kiss the Blarney Stone,
    so zipper up your flys!"

    Well fudge your undies laddies
    you're on you're way to Blarney
    with Gerald Fitzpatrick
    and Patrick Fitzgerald
    the two gay Irishmen!

    "Well grab your bags!" cried Pat Magroin
    it's time to pick your seat.
    While Paddy O'Furniture grabbed the wheel
    Dick Burns turned up the heat
    they fiddled and diddled all full of malarky
    their trousers felt a lump
    so the Bulgers grabbed their Johnsons
    and gave them all a pump

    Well fudge your undies laddies
    you're on you're way to Blarney
    with Gerald Fitzpatrick
    and Patrick Fitzgerald
    the two gay Irishmen!

    Well Peter Hickey, Rick O'Shea
    Neal Downe and Phillip McCann
    Dick Long pulled out his shillelagh
    and with it lead the band
    Phil McCracken started snackin'
    on leprechaun-on-the cob
    the bus began to rumble
    and heads began to bob.

    And so they kissed the Blarney Stone
    and grabbed the gift of gab
    Connie Lingus snapped their portrait
    in front of that mossy slab
    all they had on were the smiles on their faces
    a grinnin' from ear to ear
    from left to right
    I'll call out their names
    I'll tell you who was there...

    Well fudge your undies laddies
    you're on the way to Blarney
    with...

    Pat Magroin
    Paddy O'Furniture
    Dick Long
    the Bulgers, the Johnsons
    Peter Hickey
    Rick O'Shea
    Neal Downe
    Phillip McCann
    Dick Burns
    Phil McCracken
    Michael Fitzpeter
    Peter Fitzmichael
    Maurice Fitzhenry
    Henry Fitzmaurice
    and...
    Gerald Fitzpatrick
    and Patrick Fitzgerald
    the two gay Irishmen!
    the two gay Irishmen!
    the two gay Irishmen!

    Red Peters
    with the Joy Kingoff Singers
    "Rocket In My Pants"

    (Grenga/Stevens)

    I took the shuttle to your pad last nite
    my Venus rising as you held it so tight
    you had me in a trance
    I got a rocket in my pants
    over you.

    Alpha Centuri wasn't far from the scene
    Aurora Borealis, I don't know what that means
    cuz when you said let's dance
    I got a rocket in my pants
    over you.

    Two hearts traveling on vacation
    one fine Sunday afternoon
    my pod enters your space station
    my capsule was upright
    so I parked it overnite

    And so two space ships that pass in the sky
    have docked successfully the very first try
    an astronomical romance
    I got a rocket in my pants
    over you.

    My pod enters your space station
    My Sputnik fit so tight
    I launched a satellite

    And so two space ships that pass in the sky
    have docked successfully the very first try
    an astronomical romance
    I got a rocket in my pants
    over you.

    An astronomical romance (where the fuck is France?)
    An astronomical romance
    I got a rocket in my pants
    over you.

    Red Peters
    with The New Christy Hamsters
    "Holy Shit, It's Christmas!"

    (Grenga/Stevens/Johnson/Lawry)

    SFX - Jingling bells, intro music bed, etc.
    (off in the distance) "Ho, ho, ho....."
    Hamster #1 - "Did you hear that?"
    Hamster #2 - "Hey everybody, Santa's here!"
    Hamster #3 - "Aw, there ain't no Santa Claus."
    Hamster #2 - "There is, too!"
    SFX - knock on door
    Hamsters - "He's here!!!"
    SFX - door bursts open
    Red - "Ho, ho, ho... Merry Christmas boys!"
    Hamster #1 - "Aw, shit, it's Red Peters..."
    Hamsters - "Awww..." (grumbling in unison)
    Red - "Come on you swinging hamsters, get over here. We're gonna sing us a happy Christmas song."
    Hamster #1 - "Oh no, not another corny, stupid song."
    Hamster #2 - "Yeah, no way Red."
    Hamsters - "Yeah, yeah..."
    Red - "Get over here and sing or I'll ring your little necks!"
    Hamsters - "OK!, OK!...jeesh!"

    SUNG
    Grab your nuts hamsters, gather round with me
    forget about out all that teasin'
    we're breakin' out the holly and aluminum tree
    cuz it's that jolly season
    I know you been naughty, but have you been nice
    that's only Santa's business
    he's makin' his list and he's checkin' it twice
    Holy Shit, It's Christmas!

    HAMSTERS
    Santa comes just once a year
    just like you Red, that's what we hear
    he's got a soft spot for reindeer
    especially Rudolph's derriere
    knock it off fellas it's a holiday
    go on give santa a big kiss
    you can play hide the hamster on a one horse sleigh
    Holy Shit, It's Christmas!

    Red - "Hey, what happened to my lyric sheet? Anyone seen my lyric sheet?"
    Hamster #1 - "Heck, we don't need no lyric sheets, Red.
    We know our parts by heart. Right fellas?" (giggles)
    Hamster #2 - "Yeah, sure, I know my part, Godfried." (giggles)
    Hamster #3 - "Yah, me too!" (giggles)
    Red- "Well that's great guys, I love Christmas songs."

    SUNG
    (Godfried) - Santa tried reaching up the neighbors blouse
    after drinking all the eggnog
    (Bruce) - camped out in the bathroom for an hour or two
    squashing off a yule log
    (Raliegh) - he wandered in his undies all over the house
    but we minded our own business
    (Hamsters) - til we caught him stuffing hamsters up a gift wrap tube
    (All) - Holy Shit, It's Christmas!
    (Red) Santa comes just once a year
    up the chimney he'll disappear
    (hamsters) keep on the look out for Mr. Gear
    hamster deliveries in the rear
    Red - (grabbing the lyric sheet, speaking...) "Gimme those lyrics!!!"

    Roastnuts chestin' on an open fire
    Santas tongue stuck to the doorknob
    His balls got fondled by a carolin' choir
    While the parson gave him a hand... what?
    The sleigh came down and took him away
    That whole damn crowd was dismissed
    It was time to be jolly, a time to be gay

    Holy Shit, It's Christmas!
    Holy Shit, It's Christmas!
    Holy Shit, It's Christmas!

    Red Peters
    with Smelly Water
    featuring The Dickner Brothers (Iben, Uben & Heben)
    "Ballad Of A Dog Named Stains"

    (Stevens/Johnson/Lawry/Grenga)

    (spoken word)
    I was sittin' out on the porch the other night
    reminiscing about the good ole days
    and how my grandson Bobby and I would finish up chores
    and mosey on into town.
    Heck, we were poor back then
    but we loved window shopping.
    And I recall how excited Bobby'd get
    'specially when we stopped by the pet shop.
    you see, there was this one little puppy
    that he really took a hankerin' to
    and he'd look up at me and say
    "Grandpa... if that was my dog, I'd name him Stains,
    cuz of that splash of white on his coat."
    Well, right then and there, I made a up my mind,
    that I'd get that little critter for Bobby
    so that following mornin', I cashed in a savings bond and brought the little mutt home.
    Darnit, I couldn't tell you who was happiest that day,
    me, Bobby or that there dog.
    Them two were inseparable ....
    why, you'da need a crowbar to separate those two.
    And to this day, I can still hear the boy hollerin' after that dog...
    still hear him calling... calling out his name...

    (sung)
    Come Stains! Come Stains!
    I still can Hear him calling...Come Stains!

    (spoken word)
    you know, we don't like talkin' about it much
    but it was that following winter
    that little Bobby took ill.
    and they don't allow dogs at the hospital
    so back home you'd find Stains on Bobby's bed.
    I'll never forget the day Doc called
    and gave us the bad news about Bobby
    out of the corner of my eye
    I saw Stains lift his sad little dogface from Bobby's pillow.
    Somehow he knew that Bobby was gone
    and I swear to the good lord
    that Stains was hearing Bobby calling out to him one more time from heaven
    he just sorta smiled, crossed his paws like he was prayin'
    put his head on the pillow..........and passed away.

    (sung)
    Come Stains! Come Stains!
    I still can hear him calling, Come Stains!
    Come Stains! Come Stains!
    I still can hear him calling, Come Stains!

    (boy and dog united in Heaven) "Come Stains! Come Stains!...Stains!...Woof, woof..."

    Red Peters
    with the Dusty Underbed Orchestra
    "Little Peter"

    (Grenga/Stevens)

    When I'm all alone
    And I'm by myself
    And there's no one
    Lying next to me
    When I'm all alone
    And I'm by myself
    Little Peter keeps me company

    When I'm in the can
    When I take a shit
    I can see him smiling up at me
    so I pull him once
    then I pull him twice
    now I find it's impossible to pee

    If you go
    I'll be a one man show
    But if you stay
    I'll put my friend away

    When I'm all alone
    And I'm by myself
    And there's no one
    Lying next to me
    When I'm all alone
    And I'm by myself
    Little Peter keeps me company
    Little Peter keeps me company.

    Red Peters
    with The Babe Marino Orchestra
    "You Promised The Moon (But I Preferred Uranus)"

    (Grenga/Stevens)

    You promised the moon
    but I preferred Uranus
    the stars must be right
    cuz Uranus looks good tonight.

    The moon was in June
    how it inflamed us
    a beautiful sight
    and Uranus looks good tonite.

    I'm not queer
    I'm just experimenting an idea *
    the feeling's unrelenting
    when you're near
    that feeling starts extending
    towards your rear.

    Ain't it clear
    I just wanna bone ya'
    have no fear
    I'm not full of balogna

    You and I could fly to Uranus tonite!

    I'm not queer
    I'm just experimenting an idea *
    the feeling's unrelenting

    when you're near
    that feeling starts extending
    towards your rear
    Ain't it clear
    I just wanna bone ya'
    have no fear
    I'm not full of balogna

    You and I could fly so high
    in the sky, in the night
    well allright, yah, you bite
    You and I could fly to Uranus!

    * overheard conversation at restaurant

     

    Buy Now!

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling – Press Release

    snart

    Track Listing

    • Testaments Tinsel
    • Wagers Weavers
    • Surprisers Snoozers
    • Dodgers Decoys
    • Assblasters The Ambidextrous
    • Stoners Smackers
    • Playboys Plotters
    • Dozers Drippers
    • Turd Rustlers Teetotalers
    • Pretenders Patrons
    • Surprisers Shorties
    • Sirens Savers
    • Toasters Twisters
    • Whiners Wheedlers
    • Cocksmen Counters
    • Lusters Liars
    • Husbands Hustlers
    • Drillers Dooters
    • Fibbers Fraidy cats
    • Choppers Chowers
    • Expanders Exes
    • Pals Patients
    • Spouses Spurters
    • Spillers Spitters
    • Pluggers Playmates
    • And I'm Thinkin' About You

    +++

    PRESS RELEASE

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling To Release New Comedy Album

    Entitled ‘snart’ For Oglio Records On 4/20

    Los Angeles - Radio personality, stand-up comedian, comedy writer, singer-songwriter, author and actor Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling follows up on his classic album F. Jackie with his new comedy album entitled snart, his sixth album of stand-up comedy for his long time label Oglio Records, distributed by Fontana/Universal in the U.S. and INGrooves internationally. The CD version of snart comes with a bonus DVD containing over two hours of visuals.

    “I'm sure that you think I think snart's a great name for a dirty joke CD because it's concise, and reminiscent of snot, and fart, etc. Maybe that’s all true. Maybe that, and even more is true. Maybe. But snart's an abbreviation. I've always maintained that telling dirty jokes on stage is an art, ...'s an art, ...'s n' art, ...snart. I love jokes, and I've remembered every one I've come across since 1954. This is the sixth comedy CD I've filled with 78 minutes of the very best of those jokes, all performed "live" in front of other people who love jokes, too. I hope you enjoy listening, and that you'll also pass along these jokes night after night, much the way I do.”

    - Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling

    Jackie Martling is best known for having been a long-time cast member and head writer of the legendary Howard Stern Show from 1986-2001. He can currently be heard on Sirius XM Satellite Radio, hosting "Jackie's Joke Hunt" on Howard 101 Tuesdays at 7 pm EST. First hitting the comedy stage in 1979, Jackie's been a national headliner since the early 80's and has also appeared in many independent films and television shows including as himself in The Howard Stern Show Paramount film, Private Parts.

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martlin boasts a catalog of over thirty joke products, CD’s, DVD’s, books, electronic joke gadgets for adults and children, and joke by-products by his own Jokeland, Inc. Also to Jackie's credit, "Use Your Finger! (516) 922-WINE", the world's longest running dirty joke line, just celebrated it's 30th fun-filled year.

    “Jackie Martling is cut from the same cloth as the greatest comedians of all time. His style, experience, and amazing ability to make people laugh put him into this elite group. Jackie has never sounded better or more comfortable on stage and ‘snart’ reflects this. I'm proud of this this release and I am proud to be working with Jackie on our 8th project together.”

    - Carl Caprioglio

    snart is Jackie’s sixth comedy record and eighth record overall for Oglio Records. His previous catalog includes F. Jackie, Hot Dogs + Donuts, Sgt. Pecker, The Joke Man and Come Again?. Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling has also released two audio companions to his long running children’s electronic joke gadgets entitled Jokemaster Jr. and Grossmaster Jr..

    WEAR F. JACKIE WITH PRIDE!

    The Official "F. JACKIE" T-Shirt
    Special Price: $20.00 + Shipping

    Buy Now

    'snart'
    CD + DVD COMBO
    78 mins of Jokes + 2 hours of video

    FAN BUNDLE: CD
    snart CD/DVD - Autographed
    Price: $15.00 + Shipping

    Get it Now

    FAN BUNDLE: CD + TSHIRT
    snart CD/DVD - Autographed
    F. Jackie collectible stickers
    'F.Jackie' T Shirt
    Price: $50.00 + Shipping

    Get it Now

    FAN BUNDLE: CD + 45
    snart CD/DVD - Autographed
    "The Pot Song" 45
    Price: $20.00 + Shipping

    Get it Now

    Red Peters – It’s A Red Peters Christmas

    IT'S A RED PETERS CHRISTMAS!

    Track Listing

    Holy Shit, It’s Christmas! - Red Peters

    It’s Christmas, And You’re Sucking On My Balls - The Beaver Boys

    Santa’s Gonna Kick Your Ass - The Arrogant Worms

    Merry Fucking Christmas - Those Dreaded Gnats

    Silent Butt Deadly Night - Jingle Smells Pull My Finger

    Sno’ Balls - Rudy Casoni

    Great Big Xmas Balls - Q

    Santa Santa - Jackie West (with Billy West)

    Naughty Or Nice - Francine The Queen of Obscene

    She Gave Me Blue Balls For Christmas - Lil’ Mikey Roohan

    Merry Christmas From The Taggarts - The Billionaires Club

    I’ve Got A Boner For Christmas - Nerf Herder

    A Christmas Warning - El Privates

    Herpes Infected Christmas Elf - Pooch

    Gangsta Rap Christmas - No Talent

    Gimme Stuff - Rappy McRapperson

    Santa Claus Has Got The AIDS This Year - Tiny Tim

    You Ain’t Getting Shit For Christmas! - Red Peters

    It's A Red Peters Christmas! Commercial

    +++

    It’s A Red Peters Christmas with a new Holiday radio show

    and a companion audio release featuring 18 of the most original,

    diverse and uncensored Holiday songs you’ll hear this season!

    (Los Angeles) - Red Peters will be ringing in the Holidays on his Red Peters Comedy Music Hour radio show as heard on the Sirius XM channel Howard 101 with his annual It’s A Red Peters Christmas! Holiday show. There is the brand new audio companion to the radio show, a new Red Peters Presents compilation featuring 18 hand-picked tunes sure to satisfy any Holiday mood. It’s A Red Peters Christmas!, the music compilation, available now from Oglio Records, a Fontana/Universal distributed label. In addition to several songs being available for the first time commercially, this project features a previously unreleased track from the cult icon Tiny Tim.

    As a collector, writer and producer of holiday songs, Red realized, perhaps more than anyone, that Christmas means different things to different people. It’s A Red Peters Christmas! showcases some of the most original, diverse, funny and tragic, uncut and uncensored Christmas songs you’ll ever hear. “All I can say is, this is some pretty raw stuff. It’s definitely not your Burl Ives Christmas, or for the tame of heart.” explains Peters. “But, the songs are remarkably original, heartfelt and at times pretty funny. I’ve collected a lot of really outrageous holiday songs over the years. It’s always a challenge to fit in all my favorites”.

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling Comedy Albums

    A longtime fixture of radio's Howard Stern Show, comedian Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling was born and raised on Long Island, NY. He earned a degree in mechanical engineering from Michigan State University in 1971.

    While touring as a national headliner, Martling released three comedy LP's, 1979's "What Did You Expect?," 1980's "Goin' Ape!," and 1981's "Normal People Are People You Don't Know That Well" (all digitally reissued from Oglio Records). He blindly sent the three LP's to Howard Stern upon Howard's arrival at WNBC-AM in New York City in 1982, and Howard called him to make a guest appearance on his radio show. in 1986, Jackie became a full-time cast member and the head writer of Stern's show.

    Jackie left the show in 2001 after fifteen-year run as head writer of the radio show, four television series, and three Pay-Per-Views. He's released five dirty joke CD's, three videos, five joke books, two kids only titles, an iPhone app, JokeMaster audio gadgets and has appeared in the comedy documentary, "The Aristocrats," as well as over a dozen other independent films. He has owned and operated a dirty joke line for the last 27 years, (516) 922-WINE, and he wrote the joke page for Penthouse magazine for 17 years.

    He still works all around the country, performing his solo act of rapid-fire filthy jokes and the classic finale, "Stump The Joke Man," and is currently doing his own radio show on Sirius XM Satellite Radio Howard 101, "Jackie's Joke Hunt".

    His new release 'snart', available as a compact disc/DVD combo, is available now.


    Come Again?

    In 1989-90, I hosted "The Rascals Comedy Hour." I culled the very best of my opening monologues to create another Oglio CD. The "Stump The Joke Man" footage was taped direcly following the TV tapings.

    The crowds were always great, all fired up to be on television. I needed a new ten minutes every week for a year, so I went through plenty joke. Each monologue started somewhat clean and slowly or quickly got a bit or a ton fouler. It was great fun every time, and you can hear & feel it when you listen.

    You can hear lots of bands from my five Oglio CD's on "Raw Dog 104" on Jackie's Joke Hunt, my show on "Howard 101," both found on Sirius-XM satellite radio.

    This isn't a "Best Of Jackie" CD. It's a CD of jokes not found on any of my other CD's, the "Best Of" a year of television monologues. There are no repeated jokes on any of my six CD's (with a few very minor exceptions that slipped though the green fog).

    - Jackie Martling

    "Come Again?," is a collection of the very best of The Joke Man's six Original Red Hot, Wild, and Mild Talking Joke Book Cassettes. It includes Jackies song, FOOLS GOLD as it was re-recorded for the soundtrack of the Palisades Pictures film "Rules For Men" (in which you can also see JM as low-life lawyer, Larry Lawton.)

    Come Again? The Very Best of the Original Talking Joke Book Cassettes

    Tracks:

    • Lids & Lads
    • Ghosts & Gunk
    • Guzzlers & Gringos
    • Dopes & Danglers
    • Bags & Beasts
    • Jilters & Jerkers
    • Squawkers & Salamis
    • Superiors & Stuffers
    • Potions & Preachers
    • Sewers & Swiggers
    • Pissers & Parkers
    • Sippers & Soakers
    • Mobsters & Monarchs
    • Fools & The Faithful
    • Callers & Coaxers
    • Bunnies & Blockers
    • Smilers & Swatters
    • Wankers & Wipers
    • Cheaters & Chompers
    • Shoppers & Sisters
    • Fools Gold

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling – The Joke Man

    THE JOKE MAN


    Buy Now!

    The Joke Man was recorded on a very funny Thursday night in 1993 at The Funny Bone on South Street in Philadelphia. The taping went so well that I had to stay out and celebrate.

    I didn't get back to my hotel room until 3:30 a.m., and made the operator laugh when I asked for a wake-up call for 3:45 a.m.

    The phone rang, I got up and made my way to New York City, and got to my seat on The Howard Stern Show at 5:50 a.m., just in time for the 6 a.m. show.
    My favorite places on the CD are when I worked my way into "I used to date a midget" & the classic closer, one of the "oldest, stupidest, most childish, and funniest jokes I ever heard."

    I'll be explaining them in detail & talking about other fun stuff about my first Oglio CD The Joke Man on my blog with Red Peters.

    - Jacke Martling

    THE JOKE MAN

    Tracks:

      • Chubby and Chan
      • Parrots and Peroxide
      • Grammies and Goobers
      • Mammals and Morons
      • Taxis and O'Tooles
      • Chimps and Chugs
      • Mismatches and Memories
      • Fingers and Floors
      • Boats and Bowels
      • Furry Facefuls and The Frugal
      • Freaks and Families
      • Plungers and Poets
      • Smallcox and Sphincters
      • Bushes and Brides
      • Marriage Jokes and Other True Stories
      • Potency and Pigs
      • Craters and Crappers

    Holes, Holes, Holes
    Buy Now!

    Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling – Sgt Pecker

    SGT PECKER

    Buy Now!

    My second CD, Sgt. Pecker, was recorded in 1995 at "Chuckles," in Mineola, one of the three original Long Island comedy clubs.

    Growing out of Long Island's first actual comedy show, produced by me & Richie Minervini at "Cinnamon," a restaurant in Huntington, in 1979, were Richie Minervini's "The East Side Comedy Club," Jackie Martling's "Governor's Comedy Shop," and Jim Myers "Chuckles." On stage at Chuckles I ad-libbed a lot of the lines that are still with me every show.

    I love the very end. The CD closes with a classic motorcycle joke that I had repaired many years earlier. I'll explain that and ramble on a lot more about my second Oglio CD Sgt. Pecker on my blogalicious with Red Peters.

    After a few days of telemarketing this CD, selling lots because as part of my radio deal Howard Stern said the number twice a day to millions of listeners, West Telemarketing called and told us they were dropping the product because their little old ladies in Omaha who answered the phones refused to say "pecker." I swear.

    I announced on the air the next day that it was the last day the CD would be available by phone, and we sold 20,000. Far & away our best sales day ever. Quintessential good new, bad news.

    - Jackie Martling

    Sgt. Pecker

    Tracks:

    • Meatballs and Monkeys
    • Caninnes and Crayons
    • Rags and Racers
    • Habits and Heroes
    • Myths and Moms
    • Trips and Traps
    • Pigs and Pee
    • Herds and Hookers
    • Lovers and Utters
    • Diapers and Diggers
    • Stoppers and Stingers
    • Fowls and Fatsos
    • Digits and Dweebs
    • Dinosaurs and Daddies

    Buy Now!

    1 ...4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

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